The start of a new school year can be both exciting and nerve-wracking for children and parents alike.   It’s essential to prioritize their mental well-being along with their academic success. These both go hand in hand.  A healthy parent/student relationship is paramount in both parties mental health.  As parents of six children, over the years, we have tried to identify areas of need in the mental health/academia space.  Here is a 15 step mental health checklist to help children and parents with the tools they need to navigate throughout the school year.

1.  Communication

Maintaining open lines of communication between parents and children is crucial. Parents should create an environment where children feel comfortable discussing their feelings, concerns, and experiences. Regular conversations can help identify and address any challenges early on, preventing them from escalating.

2. Set Realistic Expectations:

Both children and parents should set realistic expectations for the school year. Acknowledge that challenges may arise, and it’s okay to ask for help when needed. Unrealistic expectations can lead to unnecessary stress and anxiety and even animosity.

3. Routine:

In this chaotic society of organized sports, dance, other after-school activities and homework this is a tall task.  Routines provide children with a sense of security and predictability. Set consistent bedtimes, meal times, and study schedules. A structured routine helps children manage their time effectively and reduces anxiety stemming from uncertainty.  Even if you have a loosely laid out calendar, that gives just the idea of routine, it will reduce stress.

4. Healthy Habits:

Physical well-being is closely tied to mental health. Encourage regular physical activity, a balanced diet, and sufficient sleep. Proper nutrition and exercise contribute to improved focus, mood regulation, and overall mental well-being.  If your child has a phone or device, make sure they wind down from it at night and do not let them sleep with it.

5.  Shared Mealtimes are Essential:

Sitting down for a meal as a family or one on one is a key tool for a healthy relationship with your children.  Gathering around a table, without distractions, enjoying a meal has been shown to promote healthy relationships and healthy children.  Take turns talking about the day, week, problems or triumphs.  Research also shows a link between family meals and healthier eating leads to a reduction in childhood obesity.

6. Encourage Social Connections :

Developing social skills is vital for children’s mental development. Encourage children to make new friends, engage in group activities, and maintain relationships. Encourage them to have a relationship with their teachers, even do some practice exercises to talk to the teachers.  We know it is hard some times but  fostering connections with other parents can provide a valuable support network.  Have them practice at home, if needed. 

7. Teach Stress Management :

Stress is a part of life, but learning how to manage it is essential. Teach children relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, or yoga. Even simple things like belly breathing, taking a walk or laying down and thinking about things they like for a few minutes, help too.   These techniques can help them cope with stress and anxiety effectively.

8. Address Bullying and Peer Pressure:

Children may encounter bullying or peer pressure in school. Educate them about these issues and empower them to speak up if they face such challenges. Ensure that you, as a parent, are approachable, so children feel comfortable sharing their experiences.  Teach children the importance of self-compassion and self-kindness.  Not everyone’s kids are bullied, some are the bullies. 

9.  Foster Independence:

Developing a sense of independence fosters self-esteem and resilience. Encourage children to take responsibility for their schoolwork, belongings, and decisions. Gradually increasing responsibilities can boost their confidence.  Don’t skimp on chores.  They are a great tool for increasing independence.

10.  Stay Engaged in Their Education:

Parents should stay involved in their child’s education. Attend parent-teacher conferences, stay informed about their academic progress, and offer assistance when needed. We know sometimes it is time consuming, but the apps the schools are using is making it easier.  Being engaged shows children that their education matters.

11  Monitor Screen Time:

This is not an option, it is your job.  Excessive screen time, especially on social media, can negatively impact mental health.(see thetrophyhusband article: https://thetrophyhusband.run/2023/02/27/are-we-too-conservative-our-kids-first-phone/ ). Set limits on screen time and encourage children to engage in offline activities that promote creativity and face-to-face interactions.  

12. Recognize Warning Signs:

Both parents and children should be aware of the warning signs of mental health issues, such as sudden changes in behavior, withdrawal from social activities, extreme mood swings, or academic decline. It may be something that can be addressed quickly and efficently, but if not it may lead to severe problems.  Timely recognition can lead to early intervention.

13. Seek Professional Help When Needed:

If parents or children notice persistent signs of anxiety, depression, or other mental health concerns, seeking professional help is crucial. School counselors, therapists, or psychologists can provide guidance and support.  seeking help does not show weakness, but strength. It is not a bad idea to address this even when there is no problem.  Many mentally healthy people seek professional help to keep themselves continually healthy.  

14. Foster a Positive Mindset:

Promote a growth mindset by emphasizing the value of effort and resilience over achieving perfection. Teach children that setbacks are opportunities to learn and grow, building their mental resilience.    Also, help them understand that making mistakes is a part of life and doesn’t define their worth and it actually teaches them how to adapt and overcome. Also, help increase your Childs confidence, not in just your ability to praise them.  But, in their ability to praise themselves.  Positive affirmation is a powerful tool to a positive mindset. 

15 Encourage Creative Outlets:

Creative outlets like art, music, or writing can serve as effective ways to express emotions. Encourage children to explore these outlets to cope with stress and enhance their emotional well-being.  It also expands their horizons, ability to reduce stress and think critically.  

Elementary or high school is an essential part of a child’s life. By prioritizing mental health alongside academic success, parents and children can navigate schooling with greater confidence and resilience. The mental health checklist provided here serves as a  guide to ensure that children are well-equipped to thrive both academically and emotionally throughout the school year.   Being blessed with six kids, we realize that every child is unique, so adjust these strategies to fit their individual needs while fostering a supportive and open environment.

Please feel free to send me feedback, let me know If I’m spot on or missed something.